At the risk of sounding like Ebenezer Scrooge, I will state unequivocally that I dislike the holidays. From sunup on Thanksgiving until sundown on New Year's, I am provided with unparalleled high-calorie grazing options and numerous chocolate-consuming opportunities. These memorable moments in munching are the recipe for diet disaster.

The task of keeping my weight in check and my thighs to a minimum is complicated by my "friends" who inconsiderately bake calorie-laden treats, slap them on a festively decorated holiday plate and then give them to me! They apparently assume that I don't mind having my derriere look like two humongous hot air balloons stuck together.

7:00PM EST 11/30/2000

Just when we thought coffee was safe again, now cardiologists are saying that the occasional after-dinner cup of coffee is worse for the heart than drinking it every day.

The research is the first to show that the surge in blood pressure that a noncoffee-drinker experiences is worse than the potential long-term effects on a coffee addict. 7:00PM EST 10/31/2000

There are many different causes for heartburn and indigestion, which include hiatal hernia, gastroesophogeal (GE) reflux, gastritis, ulcer disease, gallbladder disease, excessive acid production, low acid production, pancreatic insufficiency and food allergy. But I believe one of the most common causes of heartburn and indigestion is hypochlorhydria, which is decreased gastric acid secretion or, more simply put, not enough hydrochloric acid.

Approximately 50 percent of people over the age of 50 have low stomach acidity. The stressful lifestyles of most Americans account for much of this. Carrying too heavy a stress load is like running your car engine past the red line, or leaving your toaster stuck in the "on" position, or running a nuclear reactor past maximum permissible power. Sooner or later something will break, burn up or melt down. 7:00PM EST 10/31/2000

Q:Is there a single muscle group that can be considered "king"?

A:This one's up for grabs, but in my estimation there's no question--it's your wheels, better known as your legs. You can take care of your health by supplementing with proper nutrients, be eating food compatible to your blood type and exercising to meet your body genetic requirements. But if you are not hitting those legs, you'll never experience maximum performance, high energy levels or capacity for burning fat. 7:00PM EST 10/31/2000

My wife is always trying to get me to exercise. First of all, I hate exercise. I tried jogging about a year ago. I wasn't very good at it. I'd run about a mile, buy a half dozen doughnuts and walk back. I ran every day for six months and gained 41 pounds. If you ask me, running really packs on the flab!

Jeff Allen knows how to get a laugh. With more than 18 years on the comedy circuit and 5,000 performances under his belt, Allen has perfected the art of twisting everyday situations into comedy. But don't let the facade fool you. Behind this blue-sports-coat-toting, khaki-pant-wearing all-American dad who can make hundreds roll by recounting the early days of his marriage is a man who will tell you he's learned life's lessons the hard way.

Want to take inches off your belly?

Here are some tips to get you started. 8:00PM EDT 6/30/2000