Dads, Are You Giving the Right Advice to Your Daughter?

(Max Pixel)

There is one thing every woman needs: a father's wisdom. Whatever your situation may be, the Letters to my Daughter book, will echo a father's love for his little girl.

I wrote these letters every day for my daughter during her freshman year at college. Not only did my letters touch her heart, but the hearts of her friends as well. With my daughter's permission, I am sharing with you my heart as her father. I pray God uses these to bless you, cause you to think and make wise decisions.

My Daughter,

Today, again I told a client one of my favorite stories about you. I don't know if you remember when you were really young and it was your birthday. This was when we lived in Texas, and your brother was just a baby, so you were maybe 4. We were at Burger's Lake. You wanted to go off the really high diving board (it was probably 30 feet or higher). Since it was your birthday, I let you try it.

Get Spirit-filled content delivered right to your inbox! Click here to subscribe to our newsletter.

I was down in the water, and as you walked out at the end of the diving board, you got scared. Your eyes got big, but then you remembered how to fight that fear. You stopped, looked down at me and said out loud, "God has not given me a spirit of fear but of power, love and a sound mind." Then you leaped off the high dive into the water, and together we swam back to the beach.

In you is the Word of God and a fearless spirit. No matter what happens to you during your days of college, you have nothing to fear. God has given you a lot of power, a lot of love and a great mind, so remember when that feeling happens to fight against it and jump in.

I also want to tell you how proud I am of you. Your character has always been a great strength. God has truly blessed you with beauty and wisdom. I hope you are proud of who you've become. I want you to be proud of yourself in a good way: knowing you are doing your best and staying close to Jesus. I feel His immense pride for you as He smiles on your life. He longs for you to hear Him say, "This is my beloved daughter, in whom I am well pleased." You know that's the way Mom and I feel about you already. God is truly smiling upon your life just as your mother and I are.

I was thinking about a Scripture that says charm is deceitful. I think, as you pause on this a second, it lets you be wise in both male and female relationships but especially in relationships with men.

Some people are truly charming and likeable. Some, not so charming. The charming ones make you feel important and relaxed. It's how people use their charm that is important to watch over time. You've been in the dorm long enough to see those who can turn their charm on for a car ride or if they need help with something but have no time for someone they are not using.

Others are charming most of the time to most people. This gift is awesome if they have integrity, especially sexual integrity. When a person doesn't have integrity, though, charm gets you to assume or believe that the charm means integrity. It does not; some of my most charming clients are liars and have huge secrets.

When you experience charm, enjoy it, but don't assume anything because it can be authentic and genuine, or it can deceive you. Asking early can help you not be deceived later.

One of your gifts is you are generally grateful. I love the way you say thank you to others regularly. I want to share with you another way to say thank you, which has really become a lost art because of instant communication or texting.

You may have thought of writing a thank-you note to those who help you along the way in school and in life. Most people are rarely thanked in writing. I am referring to a handwritten thank you that goes into detail on how you appreciate them. A short note here and there is great as well, but a note that's a paragraph or two long could make someone's day.

Trust me when I say that I have helped many and few say thank you. Consider taking a moment to write a thank-you card to someone who has helped you in some way. Truth be told, I always feel better when I do this. If you ever need to change your day, thank someone. P.S. God likes this too.

You're awesome. I hope you're encouraged by remembering who you are, who you really are: an amazing and beautiful daughter of the most high God whose purposes cannot be defeated!


Doug Weiss, Ph.D., is a nationally known author, speaker and licensed psychologist. He is the executive director of Heart to Heart Counseling Center in Colorado Springs, Colorado, and the author of several books including, Letters to my Daughter. You may contact Dr. Weiss via his website, or on his Facebook, by phone at 719-278-3708 or through email at

Get Spirit-filled content delivered right to your inbox! Click here to subscribe to our newsletter.

Great Resources to help you excel in 2019! #1 John Eckhardt's "Prayers That..." 6-Book Bundle. Prayer helps you overcome anything life throws at you. Get a FREE Bonus with this bundle. #2 Learn to walk in the fullness of your purpose and destiny by living each day with Holy Spirit. Buy a set of Life in the Spirit, get a second set FREE.

Your Turn

Comment Guidelines
View/Add Comments
Charisma — Empowering believers for life in the Spirit