And at the same time, I’m afraid of feeling all the pain of betrayal again. I can’t bear the thought of it.
But I’m willing to be brave if God opens the door. If God allows it. I trust Him.
So one night I decided that I would do what I used to—spend my time with Jesus. Instead being poor, pitiful Sue, I’m putting my face in His Word as often as I need to in order to adjust my attitude, comfort my heart, bring peace to my thoughts, or remind myself of His love for me. (And He’s even blessing me with the groundwork for a second book that I’m prayerfully starting!)
And it’s working! It is helping me so very much. I’m remembering how God got me through five years ago—how He comforted and quieted my heart with His Word.
"O Lord, my heart is not lifted up; my eyes are not raised too high; I do not occupy myself with things too great and too marvelous for me. But I have calmed and quieted my soul, like a weaned child with its mother, like a weaned child is my soul within me. O Israel, hope in the Lord from this time forth and forevermore" (Ps. 131).
He’s doing that again. He’s reminding me that He is worthy of my praise. He is worthy of my trust. I can have hope because God is my hope.
"I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in his word I hope" (Ps. 130:5).
God has indeed asked me to give up much. He has asked me to trust Him with the giving up. And He has asked me to give up some things to Him—to entrust Him with some things I hold very dear.
It isn’t easy, but I’m willing. I’m willing because I know that His ways are always best.
"I know that you can do all things, and that no purpose of yours can be thwarted" (Job 42:2).
God allows difficult things to happen in our lives because He knows that through those things, we will know and we will show that He is trustworthy. He knows beforehand that He is going to equip us to walk through whatever path He lays before us. He knows beforehand that He is going to give us the strength we need to do what He has called me to do—to fulfill His purpose for us.
His purpose for me right now is to walk a path that is a bit rocky, but He hasn’t asked me to do something that He hasn’t prepared me to do. He’s prepared me and is equipping me to live where He has me.
And He has done the same for you.
And we can certainly thank God that no matter how sad and sorrowful, no matter how angry and frustrated, no matter how disappointed and grumpy we are, He will never give up on us.
Sue Birdseye is an author and single mom of five kids that range from 4 years old to 17 years old. This article is adapted from her blog, uptomytoes.com.
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