Choosing to believe
There are times when we really don't have the faith we need. Instead of pretending we do, honesty with ourselves and God admits the problem and is the first step toward true faith. Instead of covering for God, we must take the problem to Him. We let Him fix it. When we aren't sure, we can fully admit, "I am choosing to believe this. If I'm wrong, I still believe I've made the best decision."
This is how I came to real faith in God. I had no problem believing He was benevolent. After all, if He existed, He was how the Bible described Him. He looked out for His own.
But I would have seasons of real doubt about the whole deity thing. I'd wonder if all religion wasn't man-made. I'd wonder if we had constructed gods in our own image to make sense of our existence. Instead of walking away from faith, I made a decision. I didn't fake faith, I chose to believe. I studied all the different religions and discovered that the only religion that doesn't require humans to work their way into God's embrace is Christianity. Even those based on reincarnation required the individual to work for a good place in the next life. So, I sat down one day and decided: I'm going to believe in the God of the Bible. If I'm wrong, that is OK. That decision came about three months before God quickened my heart. My head knowledge became heart knowledge, and I've known God is real ever since.
What is the difference between faking faith and choosing to believe? Honesty. God wants to have a real relationship with us. We can fake it and pretend that we have it all under control, or we can live in honesty, admitting that we don't always get it and that sometimes God doesn't make sense. Whom would you rather be in relationship with? Someone who has you all figured out and works to manipulate you into doing what they want, or someone Who has honest discourse, trusting you to do your part and asking questions when you don't make sense?
Kim Martinez is a regular contributor to Ministry Today magazine's blog. She is a writer, speaker and ministry coach.
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